This affirms my decision, and I can move forward. – Annessi was just trying to find somethig to read for stepmothers that dealing with disrespectful, hard headed, stubborn stepkids.
Realize that if your spouse is not supporting you fully, you’re in for a long haul.
Yes, the house is not perfect and sometimes these issues are a major pain in the butt (I once left a mess for three weeks until my husband finally took care of it.
I’m the paternal grandfather of two adorable boys, and it’s really painful to live with the fact that I get a few hours every two-four weeks with them, while the other grandparents see them several times a week. Every day for the past year it has been argument after argument, yelling, screaming, name calling, constant comparing themselves to my children. Thank you!! These girls are his and they don’t have a false perception if him they have a false interception if f me! These kids have a mom, they have a dad, and I need to just back off and let the two of them handle however they need to.
We talked about having one child together, but he said with his 3, we wouldn’t be able to afford it.
Was unsupported from the beginning, by my now former spouse and his extended family. He sees it as me emotionally abandoning his son. Women who love men with children hear the statistical improbability of successful remarriage and dismiss it, knowing in their hearts that theirs is the love that will beat the odds. That being said the kids do need to respect you as an adult, but otherwise, a “step parent”, is simply an adult co- habitating with the child, and is not responsible for the child’s upbringing, necessities etc. Feel like I’m banging my head against a brick wall.
I’m mentally exausted.This sounds like a very difficult situation. He has always said and even told his friends when they ask that I am not his step mom I am his mom. You cannot and will not ever fill that role, so ask yourself why are you trying?And also ask yourself if this is really about control for you? I see SKs, especially if you met them when they were young, as your own children.
I need serious advice especially bc the words divorce seems to keep coming up if I don’t act like his mother and accept that he has a son and if he has to leave me he will bc his son lives with him and that’s it.We’re so sorry for your situation.
The most recent was yesterday after he punched a hole in the bathroom door. My husband and his ex share 50/50 but my husband works a lot and his ex just doesn’t want the kids if it’s not “her day”. I am consumed in my children as they are babies and feel I can’t continue to be the responsible one for my stepson. Get friends. If your partner isn’t willing or able to make changes to ensure your safety, please remove yourself from the home immediately.Good lord! A spouse’s expectation that you become a co-parent to a child that is not yours is the very definition of dysfunction. He also doesn’t support standing up to BM due to threats of court. I had been the only adult to notice when a serious health concern worsened temporarily, and she had even suggested that she would like it if I would chaperone her school trips. And just being a ball of sadness at your house.
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